I'M NOT REALLY YOUR FRIEND UNTIL I START INSULTING YOU ON A DAILY BASIS.Copy Text

"The longest sentence you can from with two words is: I do."Copy Text

IF WE'RE NOT MEANT TO HAVE MIDNIGHT SNACKS, WHY IS THERE A LIGHT IN THE FRIDGE?Copy Text

Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth.Copy Text

Always have an escape plan.Copy Text